The Pride and Prejudice of Hiccups

Cindi wanted me to make sure people know this is Joseph writing....

Cindi is currently trying to teach our children how to get rid of their hiccups through self control. She has tried to teach me many times, but it has been an utter failure. The mantra is "diaphragm control."

Somehow Cindi is capable of getting rid of her own hiccups by sitting very still and controlling her diaphragm. This does not happen to be one of my intelligences. Cindi is very proud of this particularly highly developed intelligence of hers. I suppose I cannot begrudge her some pride in this. It is the prejudice I have a hard time with. The endless teasing about my lack of self control in this regard is very painful!

I, on the other hand, have a particularly highly developed intelligence for wiggling my ears. And do I show pride about this? No. And why should I? Cindi has made it abundantly clear that she does not accept this as a worthy accomplishment of which one's spouse should be envious.

This, to me, is an example of prejudice toward one type of intelligence and pride in another. Where is the justice of it all?!?

We have decided it is time to put the question to our friends (but please be careful to obfuscate your own assorted prides and prejudices).

Which, the wiggling of ears or diaphragm control, is of most benefit?

Which, the wiggling of ears or diaphragm control, is most deserving of praise?

Which, the wiggling of ears or diaphragm control, can you do?

Thank you, thank you, thank you.